"Oh, My Aching Back!"

"Titan, I always said you were a pain in the ass." So commented Frank 'Slats' Slattery upon completion of the second set at Kinsley this morning. "And it's my back that should be hurting, not yours, Tubby Tommy." 'Slats' was riled because he and TT had just dropped a set (4-6) to Joe 'Gimpy Knees' Cruz and Carl 'Spindly Legs' Gessman. TT/'Slats' had opened up a comfortable 4-1 advantage before 'Slats' started thinking of his afternoon barbecue at Amackassin and that he was also commited to tournament play at the club. Your Titan had strained his back lifting a rowboat the other day and continues to pay a price for his stupidity. Stay home and miss tennis? No way Jose Cruz. Titan had absolutely no pop on the serve or jump to the ball but managed to place his serves and returns sufficiently well for he and 'Slats' to somehow upset George 'Chemist' Hauss and 'Big Al' Dio Dati in TT's first set of the day (6-4). If it were not so pathetic it would be absolutely laughable watching the 'Geriatric Jerk' tap balls to his partner so that 'Slats' could pick them up and bounce them to Mr. Buffoon so that the "bombastic blowhard' wouldn't have to bend. 'Happy Jack' Carey, who had dropped the opening set with 'GK' to 'Slats'/'Chemist' delighted the crowd with, "Titan, I think you need a walker for your 61st bithday. I'll bring some 'Johnny Walker Red' next week!"