Monday, February 28, 2011

"I needed Overdrive in the Breaker"

"You stalled out, Georgie!"

"Fill 'er Up, George?"

"You are so draining, Titan.

Gas Shortage

"George, just because you brought me dinner last night, did you expect to ruin my breakfast" quipped a relieved TennisTitan at the conclusion of play at the Tarpon Tennis and Sail Club this morning. It took seventy-five minutes but the 'indomitable idiot' survived the 'tenacious troubadour' (7-6 [2]) in a set with many critical moments. 'Genial Genealogist' George Pratt, coming back from a six week layoff gave the 'irksome icon' plenty of cause for worry. Winning 11 of the first 12 points 'GG' was poised to win his third straight game and leave the 'testy Titan' in the dust. However, the 'bloated blowhard' settled down to break 'Wichita whiner' in that 3rd game. TT kept his nose in front before being broken at 5-4 and 6-5, respectively. "I guess I just ran out of gas in the breaker" commented the 'dispirited dork' as the opponents met at net to discuss an afternoon luncheon. "I've got a half-off coupon at Los Mexicanos. You drive, Titan. Remember, I am out of gas. You're so 'full of yourself.' Why don't you fill my tank to thank me for playing an 'insufferable egotist."

Thursday, February 17, 2011


"You see, I gotta play this much better than 'Russkie' to give us a chance."

My Math Teachers

"Titan, with you 2 and 3 make Six! But 5 and 0 should make you embarrassed!"

Irrational Rationale

"How do you figure that" responded 'Big Al' DioDati to the TennisTitan's boast that we 'almost had you today." "How can you possibly contend that you and the 'Russain Bear' played better today than last week" continued the 'Italian Stallion.' You got bageled (0-6) in the second set, didn't you!?" "But 'Big Al,' interjected Vladimir 'Russkie' Kartsev, we were up 5-4 in the opener and at 30-30 in the 10th game. We had you and Bill 'Energizer Bunny Legs' rubbing your rosary beads." Hearing that 'EBL' had had enough. "Titan, you lost 3 and 2 last week, it was 5 (5-7) and 0 today. Winning 5 games does not make a set. You lost both sets as usual." "And 'lumbering loudmouth,' if you ever win a set against us the six games must be in the same set." 'Russkie' turned to the group and explained, "It must be time for the Titan to return to the Florida Senior Tour. His logic is that of a senile sexagenarian and he needs to sit on a sandy beach and dream about getting his first serve in with pace." "All he dreams about is getting the Early Bird special"retorted 'Big Al.' We'll see him next in March at Kinsley and he'll have a doggy bag of used tennis balls no doubt."

Thursday, February 10, 2011

The Medallion Class

"At least, I've got First Class friends, if not a first class game."

"Check your bag?"

"As usual Titan, we gave you the business, or you'd have no class at all."

Grin and Bear It.

"Russkie says, I shouldn't fly 'coach' but rather I need a 'coach."

A Warm Welcome Home

'You did what!?!' exclaimed 'Big Al' Diodati at the conclusion of play at the Yonkers Tennis Center. TennisTitan had just explained that he returned to the 20 degree temperatures of New York from Florida 'to get some tennis in.' Bill 'Energizer Bunny Legs' Tully quickly opined, "Should we be flattered or is this an acknowledgement that few people can put up with your antics on the tennis court - whether here or in the south." "A little of both" retorted the 'bodacious braggart.' "Different state, same result (3-6, 2-6)." Are the airlines awarding frequent loser miles" an incredulous 'EBL' continued. "Leave my partner alone" interjected the 'Russian Bear,' Vladimir 'Russkie' Kartsev. "Titan's tennis game usually matches the outside temperature. He was colder than a Siberian outhouse today. Haven't you seen him in the summer at Kinsley?" "Yeah, retorted the 'Italian Stallion,' that's when TT's game is in complete meltdown!" Indeed, the 'Russian Bear's game carried the load this day." 'Russkie' delivered on his service games, coming back both from love -40, and 15 -40, and rallying effectively against the 'Tullyville Trolly' to keep both sets competitive. But in the end 'EBL's superior court coverage proved the difference. As the group met at net 'Big Al,' quipped, "I hope you had a cheap flight to match that $29 racquet you use."

Tuesday, February 08, 2011

The Florida Senior Tour

TennisTitan spent the month of January in Florida with virtually no tennis activity. A very disappointing development in the life of this hacker. Local opponents that TT had played at the Tarpon Tennis and Sail Club in the past were on the injured reserved list or were simply disinclined to play because of the cool weather. Below are a few pictures and commentary about the men and the matches Titan played in February. Both demonstrates the 'boisterous blowhard's commitment to the game and love of the past as he travelled 350 miles round trip to compete against High School friends of 50 years ago who similarly enjoy the game. Titan chose not to compose a narrative about these matches. Special thanks to my gracious hosts, Bob Zanchelli and John Doughty for their hospitality, generosity, and Titan-tolerance.

Thursday, February 03, 2011

"Wait'll John Doughty sees my tennis."

Two Days in a Row @ a C.C. - Wow!

"I was hoping to rename the club 'Win Here' but I should have known better."

The 'IT' Specialist = Intense Tennis player

'unDoubtedly Doughty' claims to have been playing only the past 4 or 5 years. Goes to show you what a few lessons, being in relatively good shape, and dedication can do for any of us. No wonder he was similarly successful in the business world. He got me my only 'w' (6-3)."

'Tiger Tom' and 'Art the Dart' took TennisTitan 'back to study hall' when they each paired with 'unDoubtedly Doughty' in their (3-6, 1-6) defeats of the 'pompous prevaricater."

Wednesday, February 02, 2011

The Players Club Champions Court

"This knucklehead drove 175 miles to see me. I have to play him even though i don't feel up to it. His tennis is played on the asphalt of Yonkers. It won't take much to defeat him on the Har-Tru of LeLy Resort."

Bob 'Gavonne' Zanchelli

"You can count my victories against 'Big Boy Bob' on one hand, check that, on one finger." But it was especially sweet having him retire at (6-5). Only thing that tops that is seeing an old friend and having him treat me like we went out for beers last week. I am a lucky guy."

"I can get used to this, real quick!"

The 'Tired' and 'Retired' - you decide.

"Gavonne, has promised me 'no mercy' the next time we meet. To that I say "No Pasta" big boy!

My wonderful hosts, Bob and June

"Gavonne, you are a winner in life; business and marriage, be satisfied with that."