Thursday, September 25, 2014

Georgie, come lately (brother of Johnny)

"He was 30 minutes late but thank God he showed up to save my sorry ass."

"We weren't counting on a tie breaker."

"Titan, give Vic some time. It takes a bit to get used to your on court blather."

Vic, but not like in victory (today)

"Seriously, is he like this every week?"

The Effort

"Come on now George, give me some credit, at least for effort if not for ability" Titan whined as he reached for his camera. "You can't even tie your sneakers without my help" exclaimed the 'deli man' George Hauss as a perplexed Victor 'not a Free' Mason looked on.  "And now you expect me to win every point as you stand there as a not so innocent bystander."  Vic Mason, a newbie to the Thursday afternoon group, received his baptism of TT bullshit as TennisTitan and 'deli man' rallied from a 2-5 deficit to steal the only set played this date in a tie breaker (7-6,[1]). The 'hobbling hobo' did his part in extending rallies and lasering an occasional winner past Stuart 'not Espn' Scott and his befuddled partner. "George, you were supposed to be here at 2 PM for the start of play, not 2:30" critiqued the 'bombastic blowhard. Don't screw up again!" "Me? Screw up!?! With you as my partner: impossible. I expended ninety minutes of energy playing an hour as your partner."  To wit 'not Free' Mason turned to 'not Espn' and said, "is he always like this? And he brings his dog too?"

Thursday, September 18, 2014


"Instead of splitting the baby, we split the Slatterys...looks like I chose correctly."


"What can I say? He's still a Prince of a Guy."

Royal Bullshit

"You're no Jim McKay" commented Gene 'King' Slattery alluding to the agony of today's (4-6, 3-6)
defeat.  Hell, you needed Barry MacKay to gain the thrill of victory against 'Tutor' and me" interjected Frank 'Slats' Slattery. TennisTitan was in no mood for humor as he tried to squat his fat ass on the bench without bending his hip at the conclusion of play at the Yonkers Tennis Center. Titan was/had the ultimate pain in the ass this date as his play could only be generously described between pathetic and abominableTitan returned to the tennis wars after a month's absence hoping that his ailing joint wouldn't disappoint. It did, but not as much as his chosen partner. "You're as much of a 'king,' Gene,  as that Charles, Prince of Wales over in England who has been waiting for his mother to croak over 40 years and become 'King' of the Limeys" offered the 'hobbling hobo.' "Titan, your game is as ugly as his sour puss" retorted my Liege. "Fellas, fellas, this day is supposed to be all about my wonderful play at net" interjected Max 'Tutor' Tuchman "let's not dwell on the fact Gene couldn't make a volley all day and that Frankie severely outplayed him from the front and back court." "Yeah, Titan doesn't care much about who's king as long as it is from the 'House of Slattery.' He just picked the wrong partner" said the smiling 'coddling counselor.'