The weather cooperated, so why not? The rain had held off. Thus TennisTitan engaged in a third straight day of his passion. TT was the guest of Frank 'Slats' Slattery and Gene 'King' Slattery at Amackassin this evening. Titan was most inhospitable as he managed a three set sweep against the cousins and their partners. In the opening set TennisTitan paired with George 'Chemist' Hauss against 'Slats' and Amackassin stalwart, Dick 'It was just out' (sic) Brukenfeld in a (6-2) thrashing. Set two saw Titan/'It was Just out' eke out a (6-4) victory against the 'King' and fledgling Rob 'Mr. Twister' Mills. The coup d' gras was set three when TT combined with a tiring 'It was just out' and a substituting 'Slats' to complete the trifecta (6-3) and send the 'bloated behemoth' off to his post match refreshments with a smile on his face courtesy of the 'Kings' bar tab. During the post match recap held at the Amackassin bar 'Twister' made sure that the 'King' felt no remorse losing to the Titan twice in the same night. 'King' reflected for a moment and aced Titan the one and only time this night with, "Rob, this is our club, and charity begins at home! Titan needed this a lot more than I did."
"Oh, what the hell, I can't watch Wimbledon all day anyway" was the first thought entering TennisTitan's mind when he hung up the phone at 9 A.M. this date. He had commited to an afternoon set with a potential new tennis adversary. It was Willie 'Turtle' Aponte who TT had met on line prior to his Texas 'Kick Ass' Tour. Willie was ready for a game and Titan, having already ingested 2 Aleves to heal last night's aches, is, afterall, your basic tennis slut! Willie is a whale of a man, if not a whale of a tennis player. And the match would be played at Andrus, a facility that TT had wanted to check out. Seldom does TT get to play a man who mirrors and magnifies the 'bombastic blowhards' own limitations. If 'Turtle' is not 6'3." 280lbs, then I'm Lleyton Hewitt! 'Turtle' made Titan look like Carl Lewis in foot speed as he dropped the set (6-1) in 22 minutes. Indeed, it could have made WINS news (...we'll give you the world) for its brevity as very few balls came back. Willie, ever gracious in defeat, reminded Titan of the lesson of The Tortoise and The Hare at the net as he lauded TT's play. Titan, knowing his true limitations, retorted to the 'Turtle,' "Willie, my favorite Aesop story is The Fox and The Crow - its message is: Do not trust flatterers!"
TennisTitan was glad to get some play in today after three days of rain. Though Titan was disappointed not to have had the opportunity for a rematch at Amackassin as planned due to sloppy conditions on the clay, regular adversaries Frank 'Slats ' Slattery, George 'Chemist' Hauss, and Gene 'King' Slattery, made the Kinsley courts playable in short order. Joining the quartet was George 'Teacher' Febles and a newcomer to the Titan plethora of players, Chris 'Prince' Slattery. Since only one court was available for the six participants abbreviated sets (best of five games ) were the order of the day. 'Prince' dominated play, first partnering with 'Slats,' then with 'Teacher.' 'Prince's sire, 'King' Gene, paired throughout with the 'Chemist' and managed to wrest a victory or two from his progeny in the minisets but in so doing failed to distinguish himself. 'Prince' was Titanized in the final match of the evening which was played to conclusion (6-2) against 'King'/'Chemist.' The agility, quickness and power of the 'Prince' was more than adequate to lead TT to victory. A disgruntled father exiting Kinsley Park was overheard to remark to his 30 year old son, "Sonny boy, take it from me, it ain't easy making the Titan look good on a tennis court." The reply stung TT more than any ace that whizzed by him tonight, "Dad, Titan calls that tennis?" He obviously never read Mark Twain's "Prince and The Pauper."
Okay, so Titan had to come back to New York from Texas to get his next victory. TT has always said he'd '"travel far and wide for a good game." Well TennisTitan and three of his mates managed to get in two sets this morning before mid-morning steady rain returned to Yonkers. Twasn't easy though. Kinsley Courts were nearly ready for play when the 'bloated behemoth' emerged from his car with push broom and squeegie in hand. Titan joined Frank 'Slats' Slattery, George 'Chemist' Hauss and 'Big Al' Dio Dati for the final minutes of the clean up of the overnight rain and then proceeded to 'clean the competition.' 'Slats' wisely stepped up, volunteering to carry the Titan in the first set and was rewared bountifully (6-2). Sheer hubris prevented the chastened duo of 'Chemist'/'Big Al' from breaking up a losing combination, so TT/'Slats' administered another one-sided thrashing (6-2) as rain returned in earnest during the second set and halted play for the day. Titan had 'pop' on the serve when needed and the lob working the corners, giving 'Slats' ample opportunity to "bury that first volley!".As Titan headed to his car 'Slats' opined, "TT, how tough was it to play in that Texas heat?" To wit the 'bombastic blowhard' rejoined, "Slats, you think we're wet this morning from the rain, try 102 degrees and 90% humidity, that's wet!"
TennisTitan was 'spanked' but good yesterday. Nonetheless, TT is in search of another player in the Austin area. The Titan might even look for an opponent in his upcoming visit to the Dallas area this weekend.
"I know I am trouble" was TennisTitan's first thought when he hung up the phone this morning after agreeing to an afternoon match with Mark 'Mighty Mite' Morales, another hitting partner of 'Rolling Stone.' Mark had informed TT that he'd "be over at 3:30 P.M. AFTER he had a massage to loosen up his leg muscles." "This bad-boy is serious" opined TT to himself. It's bad enough, so thought Titan, that Mark is not even half my age but 'RS's assessment was "Titan get a good night's sleep, bring your skates, not your social security card, and be ready for some heavy pace." Your Titan was dominated from the first toss. 'MM' toyed with TennisTitan once he realized that your humble protagonist had no chance with his return game. 'MM' is much too quick for TT's patty-cake game to be successful. The Mighty Mite's heavy serve is ably complimented with a top spin second serve that TT's racquet could never adequately control. TennisTitan was not in either set dropping them at 2 and 1. TT avoided the dreaded late afternoon bagel with a late 'hold' to salvage a morsel of dignity. 'MM,' ever gracious in victory, wants back on Titan's dance card. As he exited the complex to retrieve his girlfriend who was being released from a local hospital, thereby foregoing an opportunity to pitch that shutout in set 3 'MM' shouted, "Titan, another performance like that and we'll have to rename your "Texas 'Kick Ass' Tour" to what it'll soon become: ...Ass-Kicked..." Or maybe I'll take you to the hospital for ego surgery!
TennisTitan received that much anticipated call from Brian 'Rolling Stone' Gibson this morning. "Titan, you obviously write better than you play" was the shrewd observation made by 'RS,' "Can you play today at 1 P.M.? You need to eat some of those words, so we might as well play at lunch time." Titan eagerly accepted. TT and 'RS' engaged in two marathon sets between 1:10 and 2:55 that would be eminently forgetable for their quality if not for their being played in the blazing hot Texas sun. Titan again wrenched victory from the jaws of defeat from 'Rolling Stone' by breaking back in the 9th game, and breaking again in the 11th game, to serve it out and "steal" the first set (7-5). Set two saw Rolling Stone open up three game leads of 0-3 and 2-5 before holding on to a much deserved (4-6) triumph by breaking Titan in the 10th and deciding game. Titan's parting words to Rolling Stone as he hustled to his air conditioned car encapsulated today's play, "Rolling Stone, even if you gathered no moss, I did make you sweat!" To wit Rolling Stone replied as he exited the lot, "Titan, you're like a Texas cactus... you know, 'pricky and in need of some water!"
"But I thought the Oak Ridge Boys were from Tennessee" was the comment TennisTitan heard from the excited on-lookers as he exited the courts having just completed a three setter on his first day in Austin to kick off his Texas "Kick Ass" Tour. Titan drummed up a game against the unsuspecting Brian 'Rolling Stone' Gibson at his son's apartment complex court. 'Rolling Stone' is originally from Larchmont NY, via stops on the California Tour in Los Angeles and San Franciso, where he had his right knee (ACL) surgically repaired. TT and 'Rolling Stone' went head-to-head in a 2 hour fifteen minute marathon played in 96 degree heat in humid conditions. Titan and 'Rolling Stone' split the first two sets (6-1, 1-6) - the good, the bad. But that last set was truly ugly. Children playing in the nearby pool were heard to exclaim to their sun-bathing mothers, "Why are these two old men running so slowly while sweating so much when neither can hit the ball back to the other, mommy?" TennisTitan, having given away an early break was down 2-4 when he suddenly realized, "This S.O.B. is as tired as I am, maybe more so!" Titan ran the table to take the set (6-4). As the weary visitor retreated to his air conditioned car Titan remarked, "ACL, huh, Rolling Stone? In New York that stands for A Close Loss and that's what you got!
"Dude, do you think Amackassin will be remembered in history like Juno, Omaha, and Utah Beaches have been?" This was the question posed to the Titan after he had regaled the bartender at the trendy clay court club with his tennis feats. The Titan had just completed matches 4,5, and 6 for the day and was cramping on the barstool, but still couldn't shut up about his "It's too good, Did you pay for the whole racquet?" crap as he blathered on about the 3 sets completed over the previous two and one-half hours. TennisTitan was enjoying his Coors Light with fellow players Gene 'King' Slattery, Frank 'Slats' Slattery and George 'Chemist' Hauss. The 'bombastic bonehead' savored this evening's tennis even more than the refreshments. Titan was rotated through the group, with all players being asked "to carry the bloated behemoth" for a set. TT/'Chemist' dropped the first to the cousins Slattery (5-7) after rallying from a 0-4 deficit. The second and third sets were also highly competitive with Titan/'Slats' letting a 4-4 tie turn into a (4-6) defeat at the hands of 'King'/'Chemist.' The onus of salvaging a set for the Titan was placed squarely on the shoulders of 'King Gene' in the third set. 'King'/Titan rose to the occasion breaking the 'Chemist' in the 11th game and closed it out as dusk set it (7-5). As the boys retreated to their cars post libation King Gene asked the Titan, "So TT, I guess D-Day doesn't stand for 'defeat' at least not for today." To wit the Titan rejoined, "My Liege, "D" stands for "Domain"... you play like you own these courts! Ta,Ta, for now it's off to the Texas Tour for the Titan."
Your Titan was at Edgement HS this morning for three sets of tennis with 'Rockin' Rick, 'Triple L' and Yossi 'on Israeli' time. Titan paired with 'on Israeli time' and managed to sandwich two victories (6-2, 7-5) between one dud (2-6). TT was determined to use this opportunity as a light workout prior to his much anticipated match later today on the clay at Amackassin. Tempers flared between 'RRR' and 'on Israeli time' toward the end of the third set over disagreement(s) about line calls. (See picture above). 'RRR' had a fine day with his service and was frustrated by his team's inability to overcome miscues at net. 'On Israeli time' was similarly chagrined by TT's unwillingness to hit hard and flat during most of the match. TT's reliance on lobs and placement returns is not Yossi's cup of tea unless he reaps the benefit of easy put-aways at net. Titan continues to advocate that the best pairing among these four players would have 'LLL' as TT's partner, and have 'RRR' play with Yossi. For sure 'on Israeli time' would no longer complain about not getting enough exercise and would be annoyed with TT's shot selection for a much different reason. 'RRR' would have a more skilled player at net eliminating some of his frustration. And TT would enjoy implementing the strategy to make 'Triple L's strenghts come to the fore! But someone bring an extra racquet, okay.
TennisTitan and three of his mates braved the elements for four sets of fun tennis at Kinsley this dreary Saturday morning. Titan was inspired to play in the awful conditions by the return of George 'Chemist' Hauss, but 6 weeks after his heart surgery, and by the surprise appearance of the cousins 'Slattery.' So after clearing the courts of the puddles from the past 24 hours of rain the boys were ready for their window of opportunity. Or so Titan thought. The first set was but three games old when the light mist turned to droplets. TT/'Slats' were rolled by 'King' Gene Slattery and the 'Chemist' (6-2, 6-0). The play was affected by the rain soaked balls to a considerable degree. 'Slats' still couldn't put away that first volley and TT's feet were even more set in concrete due to the slippery footing. 'Chemist's game showed no evidence of rust as he deftly deployed his deadly spin serve against the hapless 'Slats.' Rallies were long and featured an assortment of lobs and close-in net play. Indeed, today's scores did not truly indicate the quality of play. In the third set TT paired with 'King' and administered a (6-1) thumping of 'Slats'/'Chemist.' The rain soaked quartet continued for a fourth set. 'King' graciously acceded to play along side of cousin 'Slats' and continued his personal dominance leading the Slatterys to a (6-1) thrashing of TT/'Chemist.' Not to be outdone TT/'Chemist' started a fifth set against former college tennis player, Julie 'Phenom' Slattery and her equally adept distaff partner, Leslie, the 'Texas Tornado.' The set ended 1-1 in games before the heavens opened up in a torrential deluge. 'Chemist' queried Titan as they raced to their cars avoiding the obligatory post match interview sought by Luke Jensen, "Titan do you think we could have beaten two accomplished female players?" After a moments reflection Titan retorted, "Georgie, we were bound to lose in these condition; it was becoming a wet T-shirt contest!"
