Now Boarding...

"And you came home for this?' snickered Bill 'Energizer Bunny Legs' Tully at the conclusion of play at the Yonkers Tennis Center this afternoon. 'EBL' and 'Russkie,' Vladimir Kartsev presided over the decimation of the TennisTitan and 'Big Al' Diodati (2-6, 1-6) in what amounted to a rude welcome home for the 'boisterous blasphemer.' "I only hope the air miles were worth it" crowed the gleeful 'Russian Bear.' "In the motherland, a beating such as you received today, Titan, would not be reported by Pravda, but would be referred privately to the Politburo as an "appropriate action was taken by the authorities to quell the obnoxious verbal outbursts of an unnamed dissident and a 'pompous patron' who were creating a public disturbance at a local tennis facility." 'Big Al' quipped, "Titan was suffering from jet lag today. He'll play better next week, but just in case, I'll bring a barf bag." 'EBL' concluded, 'Titan's game always reminds me of my last trip on TWA. He spends too much time taxiing to the ball, the speed of his serve is strictly turbo-light; he never gets enough altitude on his returns, and he's always late with his racket preparation. He'll be out of the tennis business for sure before he runs out of themes for that stupid blog. Yea, Titan is a Whining Asshole."