Cable News Wars

"I don't want to hear it ever again: commented George 'Chemist' Hauss at picture time. The Bunsen Burner Man was reacting to the oft heard refrain from the 'blathering blubber mouth,' "Titan never double faults." 'Chemist' is no mathematician but he can certainly count the seven (7) doubles the 'bloated blowhard' threw in during this mornings play at windy Kinsley Park. The days action started out so promisingly with TT/'Chemist' cruising to a (6-2) victory in the opener against 'Happy Jack' Carey and 'Dave the Rave.' The good fortune continued into the first half of the second set against 'Big Al' Diodati and Frank 'Slats' Slattery when TT's serve deserted him. With the 'Chemist' misfiring his forehand long with increasing regularity and the 'immobile minotaur' living up to his moniker, it was no surprise that 'Big Al/'Slats' salvaged their only win of the day with a (4-6) triumph that was the harbinger of worse things to come. The (2-6) shellacking administered by the gleeful tandem of 'Dave the Rave/Carl the 'anonymous gas man' was about all the 'Chemist' could stomach. "Titan, have you got squatters rights on that three yard circumference you patrol? You threw more serves into the net than Obama has reasons for the the republican landslide. Have I communicated that effectively to you?  Do you need a press conference with softball questions to explain why you don't run?"  TennisTitan retorted, "Calm down Georgie, have some calamine Tea when you get home. I don't want to be a Party to your having a nervous breakdown. Watch some more MSNBC. Mostly Stupid Nitwits Betraying the Country." 'Dave the Rave' shot back, "Go FOX yourself, Titan, you lost here and that's what counts."